Urbin Report

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Today's example of really bad writing...

From the fertile mind of Lionel Fanthorpe:

Dan was the kind of man to whom panic and fear were as alien and foreign as green spotted pseudopods.

It was like going for a ride on the back of an animated haggis.

A metal face cannot look surprised, but this one tried to. A metal face cannot really look hurt, but this one had a damn good shot at it.

Then there was Paul Whiteland, as different from Jansen as chalk from cheese. Which of them you preferred depended on which type of character you preferred—chalk or cheese. They are both useful in their own way. You can't write on a blackboard with a lump of Cheddar. You can't satisfy your appetite with three sticks of coloured Writing apparatus.

There is more...if you dare!

HT to Paul Drye