Urbin Report

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

A few bits from an old document I found about "Real Cyberpunks" The file is dated from 1992, but the contents are older than that.

Real cyberpunks don't have the typical yuppie artfag fear of weapons that most modem users seem to have.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks know the value of useful equipment.

Real cyberpunks own at least one gun.

Real cyberpunks carry Gerber, Cold Steel, SOG, AlMar, or Spyderco blades.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks think custom steel is neat, but costs too much.

Real cyberpunks have memorized The Improvised Munitions Black Book.

Real cyberpunks know The Anarchist Cookbook is a crock of shit.

Real cyberpunks who can afford them drive something with a V-8.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks go to every police auction in their area.

Real cyberpunks always carry a Leatherman Tool.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks know what a Leatherman Tool is.

Real cyberpunks think all politicians should be castrated.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks are Libertarians.

Real cyberpunks know the difference between the Declaration of Independence and The Constitution.
Corollary to the above: Real cyberpunks know what both of those say.

Real cyberpunks don't get caught.

Real cyberpunks learn about everything from Computers to Crossbows.

Real cyberpunks know how to spell.

Real cyberpunks take time away from fucking with their computers to get some exercise.